While you're divorcing, a lot of men and women reflect on their decision and start to second guess themselves. Maybe they have to respond to comments from well-meaning family and friends. Are any of your friends or relatives posing questions second guessing your firm decision to divorce your spouse?
Just because you may have loving and caring feelings for your spouse that is actually a good thing. Before you get back into the swing of dating, getting to where you feel neutral and caring about your ex-spouse is actually one of the emotional goals to strive for.
If the two of you have children together then the more the two of you can part and go your separate ways with feelings of caring about the other, the better it will be going forward and for your children. The two of you will be sharing the significant events of your children's lives from prom to college graduation to weddings of their own. Being gracious, caring, and social towards each other over the years will just make all of that much easier for everyone all around.
Do You Still Have Feelings of Love for Your Spouse?
Just because you might still have feeling of love for your husband or wife does not immediately mean that the two of you should remain married. If you've been married now for more than a year or two, surely you probably already know that just because you love someone is not a sufficient reason to marry them.
Are You Still Attracted to Your Spouse in the Bedroom?
If you are still intimately attracted to your spouse that also is an insufficient reason to remain married. A number of the cute television shows of divorced couples often feature an awkward episode where the couple invariably goes to bed together one more time. The chemistry connection can still be strong, but that is not enough of a reason to remain married. Too many married couples know that just because you have bedroom chemistry is not enough of a reason to get married to begin with.
Are Your Life Path's Aligned?
In your 20s when plenty of modern singles tie the knot and get married, their life and career paths are in their infancy. However, by the time you are in your 30s, and certainly in your 40s, the shape of your life and your career are much better developed. In all likelihood, you have developed a certain specialization in your career by the time you over forty years old. You might even have created and nurtured strong ties to a certain geographic region. Your ex-spouse and you may want to live in different areas of the country now and your work may have grown in entirely different directions from each other. When that is the case, breath an exhale of relief and release them with good wishes. You and your ex-husband or wife may be wonderful people whose lives no longer belong together.
After you reflect on these questions and determine your own answer, then you can know for certain whether or not you really made the right decision for you to divorce. Once you know with certainty, then move forward in your life with confidence in the newly divorced version of you!
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