The Effects of Divorce on Teenagers

Divorce is a process which spares no one caught it in. As individuals the broken couple has to suffer a lot but their children, particularly teenagers, perhaps suffer the most. Teenagers whose parents are divorced or getting divorced are put into a dilemma which affects their psyche, their studies and eventually their personality.

Although there is a myriad of ways for teenager to perceive their parent's divorce, depending on the premise of the divorce and the attitude of the teenager, in most cases teenagers either blame themselves or their parents. Both of these conditions lead to changes in a teen's personality which can be long-term and quite hazardous.

When teens blame their parents, they tend to believe that their parents don't care about them and that they are the ones responsible for jeopardizing their life-for divorce comes with an aftermath which is an amalgam of financial problems, moving to another place, parental negligence and a new family setup. This makes the teens hate their parents and do anything that would show to their parents that they don't care about them either. Teenagers, with this belief, tend to argue with their parents, show disruptive behaviors in schools, lose interest in studies, indulge in sexual behavior, inflict abuse on others, use drugs and join a risk-seeking group. These kids become very sensitive, stubborn and rebellious and feel embarrassed on the very mention of their parents' divorce. To overcome their embarrassment they keep their guard up by either isolating themselves or being so offensive that people would let them be.

It may seem to some people that teenagers are old enough to understand the technicalities of a relationship and can accept the crude reality of divorce and separation. But teenagers are just as susceptible as little children, if not more, and to save themselves from the painful truth and to avoid hating their parents, teenagers start blaming themselves for the divorce. Such teenagers tend to tumble-down the tunnel of guilt and dismay. They go into severe depression and try to make up for what they believe is their fault, by taking extra care of their parents, being overprotective and taking up too many responsibilities This kind of attitude reflects in their poor grades and nonexistent social life, as their time is spent trying to mend the broken family. They dwell in a fantasy world which they cannot escape-a psychological bound with no end.

Divorce is a difficult decision which has no roundabout, though that doesn't mean that teenagers must live through the agony alone. Counseling for the teenagers along with their parents can help the teenager understand that no one is to blame. After all, teenage is a very fragile and crucial stage of life and divorce can make it even harder to get by.

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